Dangers of Waxing Nostalgic – Fm September 7th, 2015

Sometimes I post my rants too early in the day to actually profit from whatever karma may come my way. Yeah, I was feeling in a bitchy mood about getting up in the dark, eating, getting dressed and hauling my lazy butt to get to my workout. But often random events make all the my work worthwhile.
I went to breakfast after the gym and was enjoying the derth of diners on this holiday Monday. I was just getting into my first cup of coffee when six gentlemen came in and took over the table next to mine. What I first took to be a meeting of the beer belly club turned out to be a post-golf outing breakfast. I assumed the lot to be about my age give or take. Normally I’m not so critical (out loud) of my fellow human beings lest like criticism be turned my way but you’ll understand a little better as I go along.
These fine gentlemen collectively chose to give the waitress a hard time. Fine. I’m sure the lady has had worse customers. They were just being minor assholes. About that time another fellow came up with another man in tow and exchanged pleasantries with one of the belly bunch. He introduced his friend and said that he had also graduated from John Marshall but in ’74. ‘Well, you’re a lot a older than us. We graduated in ’77. Did you play football, too?’ Ah, yes, the picture becomes a little clearer. The man said ‘No, I didn’t’ at which point one of the others chimed in ‘Yup, you’re way too skinny’ which got a laugh around the table. The two gentlemen went off to find a table while my crew of ex-jocks began waxing nostalgic about their football days and whatever mindless tripe they chose to dredge up. I kind of tuned them out at that point.
I was just finishing my meal when the big belly next to me looks over and asks ‘You a cop?’ I get that sometimes since I buy all my clothes from the cop store. I paused a second and said ‘What cop in their right mind answers that kind of question with all the shit going on these days?’ He kind of flinched a little and said ‘Sorry, just wonderin’. Subtle snickers went around their table.
I managed to finish my breakfast and was getting up to leave and looked over at the table and asked ‘So you all went to John Marshall?’ The bobbing heads would have made a bobble head convention proud. One of the belly bombers piped up ‘All class of ’77. You went to Marshall?’
I replied ‘Graduated in ’70. And all of you played football?’ This elicited a collective nod. ‘You, too?’ one of the jocks remarked.
‘No, man, I was in the band. You guys got to ride on the bus with a bunch of sweaty football players and I got to ride with the cheerleaders and a bunch of other cute girls’. They all thought that was pretty funny.
I bade for over-the-hill ex-jock former allstar athletes an adieu and walked out gloatfully happy with my 13 month investment in my fitness and health.
I won’t be bitching about the gym tomorrow morning.


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